Stars and Moons
by GuardianSaint
Summary: Everyone has a reason why Shepard joined the military. But what if Shepard caught her boyfriend cheating and enlisted. But not long into training she finds out she's pregnant. After being revived, Shepard meets someone she never thought she'd see again. Together with her son, Shepard takes on the Collectors and Reapers. While building a relationship with her son.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys, I came up with this idea and had to write. Please let me know what you think, thank you.**

 _Prologue_

Eliza Shepard was eighteen, a spacer and very content with her life. Her father died when she was eight but her mother, was alive and doing minor tours as Captain. Shepard was proud of her parents and liked the idea of traveling throughout space on dangerous and spectacular missions. But she never really considered enlisting into the Navy Alliance. Not until the particular day, that changed her life, so she thought.

It was the year 2172 heading into the year 2173. Eliza was heading into the Space Station's restaurant where she was going to meet her mother before she was off on another tour. But, she never got there. Instead she saw her boyfriend, Marshall County with another girl. Right there in that moment, her whole world shattered. The happiness she had was instantly blown away.

Her broken heart is what drived her to enlist into the military. For the past month and a half, she was driven. She was the top trainee in training. Until everything collapsed when she started to feel ill. She had no energy and she couldn't hold her food. Even though the food in the training mess wasn't all that glamorous.

It was two and a half weeks of this clamy, sick routine that her over seer got her to go to the doctor on the training base. What he told her was nothing she expected.

She was pregnant.

But as normally that was joyful news, but not this time around. Eliza was terrified and had no idea what to do. Minus that she couldn't raise a baby without money and she couldn't live the military. She couldn't ask for her mother to abandon her love of service to watch her grandchild. It was unfair. So the rightful thing would give the baby up for adoption.

At the moment she decided to give her baby for adoption she didn't know that her baby and her will one day change the galaxy.

 **...**

 _Year 2183_

It's been months after the defeat of the rogue Spectre, Saren. Eliza has been on a wild, incredibly life changing journey across the galaxy. Stopping the invasion of the reason why the Prothens are extinct was no easy task. Even though it's against regs, she couldn't of done it without her lieutenant. Kaidan Alenko.

He was funny, charming and one hell of a bionic. But he also made her miss her son she gave up eleven years ago. Eliza always wondered how did he turn out and what was he studying for. In her heart she knows her son as Jackson but his family has probably given him a better thought out name.

When the Normandy was under attack, Eliza was determined to not lose anyone else important or close to her. She had lost her son, her best friend on Virmire. She wasn't going to lose anyone else, mainly Kaidan and Joker. But the stubborn pilot wouldn't leave the cockpit.

She don't regret her decision. Even as she's floating in space and trying to hold in the air that was quickly steeping out of the vile on her suit. She doesn't regret her decision even as the space closes around her in a freezing depth. Kaidan, Joker and the crew was safe. Her son was somewhere in the galaxy, safe. With those blissful thoughts, she let the darkness embrace her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Rspendragon and Dreaming of glory, thank you for the reviews. I really do appreciate it, also thanks to those who followed and fave.**

 _The Lazarus Project_

He hated Cerberus with a passion. With enough reason to, since he could remember he was taken from his parents or at least he thought was his parents. He learned from one of Cerberus' agents that he was adopted and the son of the famous Commander Eliza Shepard. The Sole Survivor and Savior of the Citadel. He wanted to be mad but he couldn't, he just couldn't find it in him to hate such a amazing woman even if she gave him up.

His mother is the only thing that is keeping him there. He remembered when he first saw her or what was currently left of her at the time. He was a part of the team that gathered his mother's body. Or what was left of it. He didn't trust Cerberus, it wasn't hard to see after the treatment he received from the galaxy-wide terrorists. He was pretty certain that the Illusive Man knew how much he didn't trust him but he didn't care what the _crazy mechanical blue eye man_ think.

Even though he didn't trust Cerberus but they were the only organization that could bring his mother back. And thus the Lazarus project was born.

The Illusive Man put a lot of equipment and credits, four billion to be precise. But the galaxy needed his mother to stop a new threat. He needed his mother.

The project involved attaching cybernetic implants to reconstruct the his mother's skeleton, reconstruction of the skin, and fluids to restart the blood flow and internal organs. The one thing that the Illusive Man refused to do was implant a control chip in the brain, fearing that it may affect his mother's personality and abilities. It was Miranda's idea and he made sure that there wasn't going to be any control chip not while he guards his mother's body.

As part of the project, Shepard underwent facial reconstruction and partially lost prior abilities and talents.

Then there was the dossier the Illusive Man had him get. A man he knew that worked closely with his mother during the takedown of Saren Arterius. Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau.

 **...**

 _"Come on Joker. Going down with ship won't save the Normandy."_

 _"Get in the pod! Go Joker!"_

 _"Commander! Commander!"_

He sat up quickly covered in a cold sweat; it's the same nightmare every night. Seeing Eliza die over and over again and it's all his fault. He thinks the same since watching Eliza get spaced. If only he had left the cockpit when he was supposed to then she never would've had to make him leave. Eliza could've gotten into an escape pod herself and she would still be alive.

A year and he's still grieving; still missing Eliza. There were so many regrets, one being that he let her slip through his weak, fragile fingers. But she found love with Alenko, and who would blame her. He was cripple who was still dealing with his Vrolic Syndrome. He hides behind his sarcasm and wit but in reality he was a turtle in a shell. He deemed no one would love him, too afraid to hurt him or ashamed.

Joker slowly got out of his bed and walk over to the window; as he was staring out he quickly went from sad to angry. After the crash the Alliance grounded him and forbid any talk about the Reapers or anything else Eliza found out about; when Eliza died the Alliance and the Council just wanted everything gone and buried along with her. He, Liara, Tali, Garrus, Wrex and Kaidan all tried to fight it; tried to make sure that defenses were still built up in order to try and protect everyone from the Reapers, but it didn't work.

After he was grounded everyone saw that there was honestly no point. Wrex went to his home world to unite the clans, Tali continued with her pilgrimage; Liara and Garrus went off the grid. The only one of them that stayed on the Alliances good side was Kaidan, and that was only because he had no problem in denying what happened. Joker guess it was his way of cooping with Eliza's death.

Joker tried getting any job possible that would let him fly but it seems as though the Council has pretty much banded him; _the bastards_. He miss flying; it gave him the freedom that he missed out on in life due to his Vrolik's syndrome, but now flying would just make him feel closer to Eliza.

In the midst of his self-loathing he had received a message on his terminal. Limping over to it he didn't recognize the name, but he opened it anyway; not too many people know how to contact him. The message was encrypted.

 _ **Mr. Moreau,**_

 _ **Please meet me at the Dark Star Lounge on the Citadel. I have an offer for you, that you won't be able to say no to.**_

 _ **Jax S**_

Well, that's very mysterious; he debated going for the longest time but in the end he decided to go. He hope this is a serious offer and not someone wanting to play a cruel joke.

When he arrived at the lounge he began looking around for anyone that looked suspicious; not seeing anyone he took a seat at a table and ordered a drink. He figured that I'd at least get a drink while he waited. He was current nursing his third drink when a man came out of nowhere and sat at my table; I'm guessing that this was Jax.

"Mr. Moreau?" he asked.

"Yeah, but you can just call me Joker. Is this a legitimate job offer or am I just wasting my time here?" Joker asked him.

"This is a legitimate offer but there's only one thing."

That figures there's always a catch.

"And that thing would be?" Joker asked.

"The job isn't for the Alliance; it's for Cerberus." Instantly he started to get up and walk away, as much as he wanted to fly but he wouldn't stoop low and work for Cerberus.

The things they have done was...there's no words to describe how awful their methods were.

"Joker, wait." he said before looking around the lounge. "Is there somewhere we can talk in private? This is extremely important and I don't want you to make a decision without knowing all the facts."

This Jax looked like whatever he had to say was life or death. So Joker finally decided to let him come back to his apartment so they could talk.

Once they arrived at Joker's apartment, the former Flight Lieutenant sat down and waited for him to explain.

"Joker, I know that you don't trust Cerberus, neither do I. But you need to understand they know that Shepard had proof about the Reapers and they know that the Council and the Alliance want to bury what happened, but they don't. They want the truth and there's only one person that can find that truth, and that's Eliza Shepard."

Joker was silent for a few minutes before he gave a humorless chuckle. "Yeah, tell me something I don't know, but you're too late. Eliza's gone and everything she dug up has been buried along with her."

"Not necessarily." he said. Jax pulled out a data pad and showed him a live feed of…..

Instantly there were tears in his dark green eyes as Joker looked at the feed. It was Eliza; she was alive, attached to a bunch of machines but alive.

Joker wanted to speak but his voice cracked; Joker took a deep breath and tried again. "How is this possible?" finally letting the tears fall.

"When they heard what happened Cerberus began looking for Shepard's body. When Cerberus and myself found her, they started trying to bring her back. Cerberus call it the Lazarus Project; they've completely rebuilt her just the way she was...before, mind and all. Cerberus want to fund Shepard's search for the Reapers, but they and I know that she can't do it alone. More importantly I know that she won't trust Cerberus either; that's where you come in."

Still looking at the feed Joker couldn't believe it; it seems too good to be true.

"Shepard is going to need someone she trusts by her side; someone she knows."

Joker looked at the feed again and it was in that moment that he knew what he had to do. He wiped the tears from his face before looking up at Jax.

"When do we leave?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Dreaming of Glory, thanks for the review.**

 **I forgot to mention that this story is slightly AU. But I'm sure you wonder readers already figured that out. Enjoy.**

 _Mechs and Memories_

Eliza blinked her eyes only for her vision to be blurry. She could barely make out two beings over her.

 _"Shepard is awakening,"_

 _"Willson,"_

Those were the last two things that she heard before falling back into the unwelcome darkness.

 _ **"Shepard!"**_

Eliza groaned as she tried to piece together what was going. What was that voice? It kind of sound familiar.

 _ **"Shepard, get up. The station is under attack. Grab a pistol and armour,"**_

Eliza slowly opened her eyes and to see a bright room but she wasn't alone. She began to sit up to clench her teeth at the pain that suddenly spiked.

"Shepard, come on. We got to move." came a calm but equally worried husky male voice.

Eliza took deep breaths before looking towards the direction of the voice to gasp. There was a man, maybe no more than twenty two years old. He had a pale skin baby like face but it was covered with a five o'clock shadow. His dark brown hair was chin length and...some would call it messy. His bang was swept to the side which provided a beautiful frame for his face. He was wearing a black and blue Kestrel body armour. The main parts of the armour being black but the trimming and lights being blue.

But it was his eyes that caused her to look like she seen a ghost. Pale blue eyes that mirrored her own looked right back.

She was be delusional or something for she spoke the first thing that came to her foggy brain. "Jackson?" Eliza shook her head before focusing on the man in front of her. "But that's not possible. He's a boy..."

"It's me, mother. As for everything else...I explain when I get you to safety."

Eliza instantly frowned. "Ever since I woke up someone has been telling me what to do."

Jax shook his head. They were right, she was stubborn. Then again, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. "That would be Miranda." with a deep breath he went on. "What do you remember?"

Eliza looked down and instantly was assulted by vigil memories of the Normandy being attacked and her..."I died."

"Two years and some weeks, blah blah blah." Jax looked at the horrified expression on his mother's face.

"Two years? But then you should be..." Eliza tried to continue but the information she received wasn't something she could just roll off her shoulder.

Jax could see the pain behind his mother's eyes. "Technically I'm twelve years old. But Cerberus had genetically modified me. Making me older than I actually am. That includes some bionic ware."

His explanation didn't ease anything over. It only made Eliza more horrified. "Cerberus did this to you?" some more memories started to flow. "I remember Cerberus on my quest to take down Saren. A pro-human group. A enemy to the Alliance and Council."

Jax rolled his eyes. "The Alliance and the Council are no good assholes."

"Jackson!" Eliza cried out in shock. Quickly forgetting that wasn't a boy in front of her and cursing.

"I'm not sorry. They didn't even try to find you. They buried everything you accomplished. They dismissed it as though you made it up!" there were tears in his eyes and it pained Eliza.

Eliza sighed before walking over and slowly placed a hand on her son's armour shoulder. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I gave you away. That you had to go through that torture...I'm.."

Eliza stopped when Jax grabbed her hand while it rested on his shoulder and laid his face against it. "Mom, don't. I know you were only trying to give me my _best shot._ "

A small smile but a smile nonetheless graced his lips. Eliza smiled in return and for that moment felt she finally did something right.

"Now, let's get out of here. I had enough of this station that could last a lifetime."

Jax chuckled as his mother went to put on the issue N7 armour, he stolen from a Alliance station. "Or two in your case."

 **...**

Joker was sitting the station's mess hall looking at the data pad he got from one of the Cerberus crewmen. As he looked at the picture of Shepard on the pad he couldn't stop the tears or the memory that flooded.

 _"You shit!"_

 _Joker didn't have time to brace himself. He was forced against the wall in a wave of dark energy. His back connected against a strut, metal digging painfully into his flesh, and he heard the sickening crack of a rib._

 _"Grab him!"_

 _"Stand down, Alenko!"_

 _Joker slipped to the ground, doubled over in pain, hissing through his teeth and counting backwards – anything to ease the sharp pain slicing through his chest._

 _"Jeff, are you alright?" Dr Chakwas asked and kneeled next to him. Her hair was dishevelled, clothes singed and stained with blood._

 _Joker looked up and then past her. Garrus and Wrex were restraining Kaidan, holding him back before he did anything he would hopefully regret. Their gaze met and Joker felt a shudder run down his spine. Hatred. No one had ever looked at him like that. Like they would carve him into pieces of meat. His eyes stung with fresh tears. He knew why Kaidan would glare at him like that. This was all his fault._

 _"Jeff, I asked if you were alright," Chakwas repeated, placing her hand on his shoulder. He winced and flinched backwards._

 _"Broken rib, broken arm…probably fractures in my legs and right ankle," he rattled off. He knew the drill. But he didn't look at her. He didn't see anyone anymore. Just space, darkness, the burning wreckage of the Normandy and… A shudder tore through his body and he brought his good arm to cover his eyes._

 _"I am so sorry…" he said, the words all tumbling out of his mouth. His breath caught in his chest, a painful knot of air that tore through his lungs. Everything seemed too loud, too bright, too much._

 _"You should be sorry!" Kaidan yelled and pulled at Wrex's arm around him. "She went back for you! You didn't obey an order and she died saving you."_

 _The rest of the rescued crew – all that was left – turned to look down at Joker now. Crumpled on the floor, crying into his sleeve, on the verge of complete panic._

 _Liara wrung her hands together. She was dirty, her suit blackened in patches. "Is this true?" she asked._

 _Kaidan finally threw the Turaian and Krogan's arms off him, but made no further move to attack the fallen pilot. "Damn right it is. The Commander told me to leave so she could save Joker. You couldn't abandon a ship and now she's dead and you, of all people, are alive!"_

 _Joker pulled his legs closer to his chest, ignoring the sting of pain from his ribs, the slight twinge that definitely meant he had at least a hairline fracture in his ankle._

 _"If Joker had not been at the helm we would have suffered many more causalities this day," Garrus said. Even at a time like this his voice was so calm. "Shepard would have known this. This is not Joker's fault."_

 _"But it doesn't bring her back," Kaidan said. Everyone could hear the barely suppressed emotion in his voice as he tried to hold back his anguish. He shoved past Garrus and Wrex, who let him go without word._

 _There was no use in running after him. He needed time alone_

Joker sighed and looked back down at one of the more recent images on the data pad. An article on the Shepard memorial the Alliance were currently arguing over where to place. There had always been one thing that rivalled the rush of sitting at the helm of the best ship in the galaxy – the look of surprise, then respect from its CO, when Joker had anticipated her moves.

Joker had taken great pride in the fact. He knew when to place the Normandy into dock for refuelling and repairs so that it wouldn't disrupt the Commander's missions. He knew when Shepard would need pickup, transport, even which squad he was likely to take on a mission. Joker didn't like to say he was spying on the Commander – just learning. He was the best goddamn helmsman in the Alliance, hell, probably in the whole galaxy, and part of that title meant knowing the crew and especially the CO. It didn't mean he had to like them, it didn't mean he wanted to spend any time with them, but he knew his crew.

It just so happened that he did like Eliza Shepard.

And he had killed her.

"Hey, Joker,"

The pilot looked up to see Jax looking down at him from the other end of the table. To say that they were friends was going too far. He was a hothead, renegade and stubborn. But also very familiar but he couldn't put a finger on it.

"You been drinking. I smell the alcohol from here."

"I was just having a drink. Geez. It's not going to kill me," he snapped. He leanedback in the chair wishing for Jax to leave.

Jax picked up the empty bottle and waved it at him. "This will get you killed, Jeff. And it certainly is not going to make anything better."

"Nothing will make it better!"

Jax crossed his arms over his chest. At the moment he was wearing a dark grey fitted t-shirt black jeans and military issued boots. "Jeff, Shepard is alive. No need to feel this.."

"No need to go on. I already been over this shit. Survivor's guilt," Joker drawled, waving his hand at Jax. "And it's shit. It's not survivor's guilt if it's true. Shepard died because of me. That's a fact."

"Jeff! The Commander went back for you because she would not leave you behind. You knew the Commander…she left no one behind. Even smart mouthed pilots."

Joker wanted to retort but couldn't. He was stunned. No wonder why he didn't like him.

"Did you want something?"

Jax smiled before turning to head for the main level. "Yeah, my mom is finishing up with the Illusive Man. She's going to want to see a friendly face."

Joker admit he was excited to see Eliza again. He went limp after the Cerberus Lieutenant when he finally realized what he said.

"Your mom...?"


End file.
